Slate, Spires, and Sophistication: An Art Critic’s Winter Escape to Mayen

My dear friend, welcome to Mayen. It is the 17th of January, 2026, and while my beloved Haarlem is likely shivering under a damp North Sea mist, we are here in the volcanic heart of the Eifel region. You might ask why an art critic would drag you to a town known for slate and basalt in the dead of winter. The answer is simple: texture. Inna does not do "pretty" postcards – I do composition, history, and the kind of moody, monochromatic aesthetics that would make a minimalist weep with joy.

09:00 – The Caffeine Composition

We begin our day at the Market Square. Look up at the Genovevaburg castle looming over us – it provides the perfect vertical axis for our morning. But first, coffee. We are heading to a small local spot near the square. In January, you want a roast that is as dark and complex as a late – period Goya. While Mayen might not have a third – wave espresso bar on every corner, the traditional German "Kaffee und Kuchen" culture is its own kind of performance art. Order a double shot and watch the locals. There is a sturdy, basalt – like reliability to the people here that I find quite grounding.

Practical Tip: Most shops here open around 09:00 or 10:00. Wear your thickest wool coat. The Eifel wind does not care about your fashion choices, though a sculptural oversized scarf is always permitted.

10:30 – The Twisted Masterpiece of St. Clemens

Before we hit the museums, we must pay our respects to the twisted spire of St. Clemens. Darling, look at that tilt! It is the "Leaning Tower of Pisa" of the Eifel, but with more Gothic angst. Whether it was green wood warping over centuries or a deliberate architectural "f-you" to symmetry, it is magnificent. It breaks the visual plane in a way that feels incredibly contemporary. Inside, the silence is a perfect negative space. It is the ideal palate cleanser before we dive into the heavy stuff.

11:30 – Genovevaburg and the Eifelmuseum

We are walking up to the Genovevaburg now. This castle has been destroyed and rebuilt more times than a socialite’s face, but the current iteration is a triumph of late – Gothic and Renaissance restoration. Inside lies the Eifelmuseum. Now, I know what you are thinking: "Inna, a regional museum?" But listen – the curation here is surprisingly sophisticated. They tell the story of the landscape, and for an art lover, the geological history of the Vordereifel is essentially the history of sculpture. The earth carved itself before we ever touched a chisel.

Local Insight: Pay attention to the "Eifel-Schatz" (Eifel Treasure). The way they display the artifacts using light and shadow is quite dramatic. It is less a history lesson and more a curated installation of human survival.

13:00 – Deep Dive into the Deutsches Schieferbergwerk

Now for the piece de resistance. We are going sixteen meters underground into the German Slate Mine Museum, located right beneath the castle. This is why we are here. The slate is the "black gold" of Mayen. Descending into the tunnels feels like entering a massive, immersive installation by Richard Serra. The damp walls, the smell of wet stone, the absolute darkness – it is sensory art at its most primal.

As an art critic, I am obsessed with the slate’s cleavage – the way it splits into perfect, thin sheets. It is nature’s own lithography. You will see how the miners lived and worked, but I want you to look at the textures of the cavern walls. It is a masterclass in tonal values. Gray upon gray upon charcoal.

Practical Information: It is a constant 8 degrees Celsius down there. If you didn’t listen to me about the wool coat, you will suffer for your art. Also, the elevator ride is a bit of a thrill – hold onto your hat.

14:30 – The Quest for the Elusive Oyster

By now, I am famished. I have a craving for oysters – the ultimate edible sculpture. Now, Mayen is about as far from the coast as one can get in this region, and finding a fine Fine de Claire in the Eifel in January is a challenge I relish. We shall head toward a refined bistro near the town center. If they don’t have oysters, I shall settle for a glass of dry Mosel Riesling and something involving local venison. In the Eifel, the food is like the art: heavy, honest, and meant to sustain you through a siege.

16:00 – Lapidea: The Sculpture Park

We are taking a quick five – minute drive (or a brisk walk if you’re feeling athletic, which I am not) to the Lapidea site. This is an international sculpture symposium area. Every few years, artists from around the world come here to carve massive blocks of basalt and tuff. In the winter light of late afternoon, these monolithic forms look like ancient sentinels. It is contemporary art that refuses to be ignored. The contrast between the raw, volcanic stone and the polished, artistic interventions is exactly the kind of tension I live for. It’s like a conversation between the Earth and the ego.

Tip for Photographers: The "blue hour" on January 17th starts early, around 16:45. The shadows on the basalt sculptures become incredibly long and sharp – perfect for your Instagram, though please, no pouting selfies in front of the abstract expressionism.

18:30 – Dinner and Reflection

We end our day back in the old town. The city walls are lit up now, framing the town like a precious object in a vitrine. We shall find a cozy "Weinstube" – a wine tavern. We will sit by a fire, drink something bold and fermented, and discuss the day. Mayen isn't about the flashy galleries of Berlin or the polished museums of Amsterdam. It is about the honesty of the material. It is a city built from its own foundations, literally. Every building you see is a piece of the ground beneath it, reshaped by human hands.

Final Thought: As we finish our wine, remember that art isn't just what hangs on a white wall. It’s the curve of a twisted spire against a winter sky, the rhythmic cleavage of a piece of slate, and the way a small town in Germany can make an art critic from Haarlem feel like she’s discovered a hidden masterpiece. Tomorrow, we head back to reality, but tonight, we are part of the composition. Cheers, darling!